Many of us enter a period of reflection towards the end of the year. For some of us it has been one of the toughest years yet. Nevertheless, we must not forget that God still loves us and even the heaviest of storm clouds eventually dissipates to reveal clearer skies.
There are certain moments that stand out when I look back on my life that have been particularly devastating. I am accustomed to hard times and thankfully it has produced valuable personal growth (trials have a way of doing that). This year however, I experienced a kind of devastation that was new to me.
When I received the news, I clearly remember having a sudden need to get outside. I am not usually an ‘outdoorsy’ person, but something tugged at me to step out. I found myself immediately surrounded by both life and beauty; my attention drawn to the dragonflies buzzing past, bees ambling around from flower to flower, great trees stretching up to the sky and birds flying overhead, all beneath a golden sun. It looked like any other warm, beautiful day, even though I had just been abruptly plunged into a type of loss. Even in my grief I could still see such wonder everywhere I looked – a gift from our Creator.
As I moved through the stages of grief over the following months, there were times I wasn’t sure if it would get better. Even knowing the goodness of God, knowing it and not doubting it nor blaming Him, still I could not be certain if I would recover. The music that had continuously filled my heart fell dramatically silent.
Be assured that the Lord is indeed close to the broken-hearted (Psalm 34:18) and though I don’t yet feel one hundred percent healed, the bold declaration of God’s love is ever before me, sustaining me. His promises don’t change just because our feelings or circumstances do.
It’s an unfortunate reality that life can turn on us at any moment (look what happened to Job). This does not mean God no longer cares about us. We do still have so much to look forward to, as Paul reminds us:
“We have sufferings now. But the sufferings we have now are nothing compared to the great glory that will be given to us” – Romans 8:18 ICB.
“Furthermore, we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called in accordance with his purpose” – Romans 8:28 CJB.
Habakkuk 3:17-19 declares that in the midst of everything going wrong, God is the One who gives us strength. It’s a passage I encourage you to make your own version of. When it speaks of crops failing and empty barns with no cattle, we can for example modify this to express our own problems: though the bank account is empty and the pantry is bare, though there be no baby in my arms and no solutions to my problems… experiment with simply inserting reference to your own circumstances, without changing the overall message.
This can be done with other passages too as long as you are careful not to change what the verse is saying at its core, and may be helpful not only in terms of connecting with Scripture, but also making it more memorable:
“The Lord is close to all whose hearts are crushed by pain…” (Psalms 34:18 TPT) could become “though I am crushed by pain, I know the Lord is close to me”. Make it personal. It is God’s message to all, including you specifically.
My takeaways this year are thus: bad things happen, but all around us life goes on. Beauty is still everywhere, we just need to look. Things can hurt, and God is still good. And it will get better.
As for the music in my heart, it’s not back in full swing yet, but sometimes I can hear it playing cautiously, just a little, bringing notes of hope and quiet praise.